Familial estrangement is a complicated issue that can cause deep pain and personal complexities. Furthermore, it can have several impacts on legal and financial matters that is likely to affect how you plan your Estate, both as someone who has estranged a family member, or as someone who has been estranged. Unfortunately, it isn’t an uncommon occurrence, as according to Stand Alone, a charity supporting estranged adults, approximately 19% of individuals in the UK report estrangement in their families, although it is suspected that this number is higher in reality. The sensitive nature of estrangement means that great care needs to be taken when dealing with it, and so this article explores the challenges surrounding it, offering ways to mitigate some of the legal quandaries, as well as a deeper dive into the damage and causes of estrangement, particularly as a result of homophobia.
What is Estrangement?
Estrangement occurs when a family member is cut off or becomes distant from another, resulting in a state of alienation. This can happen between any breakdown in familial relationship, but evidence from Stand Alone suggests that parent-child estrangement is the most common, with approximately 40% of estranged individuals being estranged from their parents. The causes vary, from a difference in values or lifestyle choices, to abuse and trauma. Additionally, estrangement can be tied to homophobia or other prejudices, and may even result in disownment. It is important to recognise the difference between disownment and estrangement; while estrangement is a breakdown in a relationship resulting in distance between the two, disownment is the refusal to claim a member of your family, and often results in not even acknowledging their existence. Estrangement may be temporary, but disownment is permanent.
For Individuals Who Have Estranged Someone
Regardless of the reasoning behind an estrangement, it may be the case that you wish to exclude the estranged individual from your Estate. However, this is more complicated than omitting them from your Will, and instead you must make your wishes explicitly clear, else they mount a successful claim. This is possible due to the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependents) Act 1975, which provides recourse to certain family members if they are able to demonstrate that they haven’t been sufficiently provided for in the Will.
Explicitly stating your reasons behind their omission is an important step in excluding someone from inheriting a part of your Estate. This can be done in a Letter of Wishes, which is a document that accompanies your Will. While it isn’t legally binding, it can guide your Executors towards decisions that align with you wishes, as well as being a very useful contextual document, particularly as evidence in court.
You may also want to consider alternative arrangements that could reduce the risk of claim. An example would be making a one-off gift in your Will with a forfeiture clause, by which contesting the Will would see them forfeit the smaller concession. Instead, you may find it helpful to equally distribute your Estate if you have multiple children in order to reduce potential tensions. That being said, these are by no means guaranteed and don’t necessarily provide any legal credence against a claim. This means that the best way to ensure your Estate is distributed according to your wishes is through clear instructions, as well as a clear description of your reasoning.
For Individuals Who Have Been Estranged
Those who have been estranged often find themselves in a predicament as to whether they will inherit from the family member who estranged them, as well as whether they should include that person in their own Estate plan. The situation itself can be emotionally complex, and so trying to navigate the legal world at the same time can be challenging. Once you know whether you will receive an inheritance or whether you wish to include the family member/s in your Will, then you can proceed with the legal process, which we can help guide you through.
If your family member has excluded you from their Will, an important decision is whether you wish to make a claim. Some may not want to inherit from someone who would estrange them, however others may still feel entitled to part of their Estate, or could be financially dependent on the deceased. If you want to pursue challenging a Will, this is possible due to the aforementioned Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependents) Act 1975, although its success may depend on other factors, such as the nature of the estrangement, your financial circumstances and the size of the Estate, rather than purely your connection to the deceased. Even if you are entitled to inherit due to the Rules of Intestacy, the breakdown in a relationship may complicate the administration of the Estate. This means that reconciliation may lead to better outcomes, if it is possible. This can save all involved from possible emotional and financial turmoil associated with a legal challenge.
If you are estranged and making an Estate plan yourself, it’s important to consider how you divide your Estate amongst Beneficiaries. Whether you wish to include estranged relatives or not, it’s advisable to include your reasons in a Letter of Wishes. This could be for the same reasons as cited earlier, meaning it can be useful in defending against a claim against your Will, however if you do include an estranged family member, it can be just as useful in justifying your reason to include them to those who know of your relationship breakdown and oppose the idea that you would include them.
If you know you don’t want a family member who has estranged you to be a Beneficiary, there are a further two steps that you may wish to consider. If you are not leaving your Estate to family, consider other Beneficiaries; this could include friends or other loved ones, but it could also include charities or foundations. By doing this you can ensure that your Estate provides for those who you feel are deserving of it. You may also wish to take measures to protect your wishes, as is the case with writing a Letter of Wishes. This also includes regularly updating your Will through any changes in relationships with estranged family members, especially reconciliation, further distancing or disownment.
Health Implications of Estrangement
Estrangement can have serious mental health implications, particularly for those who have been estranged. In fact, 81% of estranged individuals suffer from significant mental health issues as a result of estrangement, according to Stand Alone. Commonly, this manifests in chronic stress, depression and/or anxiety. Isolation from their family often results in estranged individuals lacking social support, only exacerbating negative mental health. Beyond this, poor mental health is intrinsically linked to poor physical health, and it is proven that conditions such as depression lead to increased risk of fatigue, insomnia and digestive problems, and even more serious health concerns such as diabetes and heart disease. Because of this, it is important for those who have been estranged to build support systems. It is also why we must show compassion and support, as it may be limited in their lives.
Estrangement and Homophobia
Homophobia is a concerningly common cause of estrangement. According to Stonewall, 21% of LGBTQIA+ experience some form of estrangement or disownment directly as a result of their sexuality or gender identity. This is particularly within traditional, conservative families, where divergence from the heterosexual, cisgender ‘norm’ is met with rejection, hostility and exclusion. This exclusion can often lead to emotional and financial challenges.
Legally speaking, however, there is a level of protection that is afforded to LGBTQIA+ individuals facing discrimination. While the main guiding principle behind protection against discrimination, the Equality Act 2010, has no influence over inheritance and claims against an Estate, the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975 does provide protection to a degree. The grounds for a claim against an Estate being successful is largely based on the original distribution of the Estate failing to provide sufficiently (or entirely) for a certain family member on an unreasonable basis. Discrimination, and specifically homophobia, is one such reason that could be considered ‘unreasonable’. While this offers little solace to a potential lifetime of hostility and loneliness from an individual’s family, it can at least ensure a claim against an Estate is possible.
Whether you are estranged or have estranged someone, making sure that your Will reflects your wishes is the most crucial aspect of Estate planning, and if you are seeking legal advice regarding your Estate plan, we offer free 30-minute consultations where we can discuss your specific situation and how we can ensure the best outcome for you. If so, please don’t hesitate to contact us here.
